skip to main |
skip to sidebar
this a day seen less than once in a full moon.
more cracker than animal.
i don't know if this is significant at all, especially to those who've never met me in real life...but i cried myself to sleep last night and i woke up with tears in my eyes. That has never happened before, sadness enveloping me and ruining my day before i even remember i have phonology homework due in a few hours (that usually sends me into a fanatic panic mode where I try to rationalize and think out problem sets intended for a week's worth of pondering). In actuality, the event reducing me to this extreme reaction of misery set off a chain reaction of realizations of related incidents.
Loneliness, though tolerable, takes its toll and being abandoned doesn't help.
Rationalizing and connecting on the micro-scale have little use for me now if i'm just going to get fucked up (and not in the way i want).
That title there is from Père Goriot. Balzac uses so much imagery to exemplify the realism that should be apparent in a novel. It's quite insane-like, yet also amusing when it's something humorous or pertaining to yourself. That's not relating to me at the moment, though.
Something quite strange today (other than realizing I had a creepy dream last night), most of the conversations I've had have pertained to something that's occurred in my life...to a degree. Or perhaps some issue that has surfaced at some point or another during my existence. I found that rather freaky.
Ok, so in my dream there were these truly strange umbrella plants that actually looked like fucking umbrellas that are open and laid on their sides. like that. I don't understand the environment that I was wallowing through.
