Experience Escape

After many years, I have finally attained the book From the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. The first time I heard about this book was in elementary school from a literature computer game. I have no idea where I got the game. I don't know what grade I was in. The only thing that interested me about this book was the idea of living in a museum. Since my youth, museums have been places of wonder filled with ancient and odd things. I learned how mummies were preserved, what a humman heart looks like, how airplanes fly, and what makes a Bernini so gotdang expressive. So of course I wanted to live in a museum, to explore the halls without being intruded and interrupted by hoards of loud children acccompanied by their aimless caretakers. I dreamed of touching everything that said "do not touch" and sleeping on those centuries old beds. This is what occured in the aforementioned book.

the met

This book takes place on the East Coast of the U.S.A., northeast really, and primarily in New York City at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I may have been there. Can't recall. My realistic fantasy had been to grow up, move to New York, and be happy. I have since changed that fantasy into something less idealistic and romantic. (There are other cities to give that exact feeling!) In short, a girl and her brother run aawy from home (her reason being underappreciated in the family) and spend their time in the museum, hoping their family will repent and beg them home, but the children get distracted by a mystery involving a statue. I quite enjoyed reading about how the children spent their days trying to fit in with tour groups or when they took the time to venture into the city. The mystery itself was not appealing to me. I don't think it was that exciting, honestly. The best part of the story for me was when the children met Mrs. Frankweiler, who occasionally tells the story in retrospect.

now the met is known for its fashion...

The Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler in the story is clever and direct with age. She is reasonably impatient, curious, and want for understanding. There is something loathingly terrifying about her, but when she rears a gentle head she appears all the more grandmotherly. There was one quote from the story, obvioulsy stated by Mrs. Frankweiler, that was profound:

"...I think you should learn, of course, and some days you must learn a great deal. But you should also have days when you allow what is already in you to swell up inside of you until it touches evrything. And you can feel it inside you. If you never take time out to let that happen, then you just accummulate facts, and they begin to rattle around inside of you. You can make noise with them, but never really feel anything with them. It's hollow."
Perhaps this is a sign for me to stop freakng out about going to school to learn new things. Or even a sign for me to meditate and ruminate on all the things I've mentally recorded over the years.

nyc c. 1960s

It Lives

I don't know why I took a break from blogging. Perhaps too much was happening and there was no way for me to encapsulate such events and/or feelings in posts that would clearly express the way I saw things. I'm also much older than when I started this project. There is less of an urge to try explaining how "cool" and "non-chalant" I am to an audience I'm sure doesn't exist. But we all know the real reason I haven't been making new posts is because I'm lazy.

In light of the new year and same old me, I have decided to return to the medium I prefer. The social media that takes time and effort without having to care about what I look like and who I'm trying to influence (I assure you I'm not. I'm just telling things about myself and if you like it you're weird; if you don't, good for you. I'll be using a lot of words. There will be puns. The irony might be overwhelming. Some sarcasm could scare you. So what I'm saying in a very roundabout way is I will be writing here again. I forsee posts regarding obscure ideas, bad movie/animation/music/book/game reviews, and, of course, the vague descriptions of my adventures in living. At least I will try to add pictures. For the visual people.
Viva verbal punches.

Long Ago, but Far Away

First, I feel like an idiot for going on hiatus for YEARS. Not even a month or two, but fucking years. It's true I have been busy, even now this is the first time I've had the chance to breath and catch up on my existence in nearly two years. I've had to transition into the realm of a working adult and it is absolute hell. Money is nice, but it's not enough for what one goes through.
It was weird because I was thinkng about this blog, so I went and read my older posts. I remember fawning over British "indie" bands and my nonexistent, unrequited infatuation with Alex Turner. That recording of TLSP gave me the chills. He is still quite the cute musician with his long hair and swinging 60s style. I'm at a point in my life where I don't know anything about new music trends. My ears gravitate towards podcasts about history and strife, interconnecting the then and now and why we keep repeating ourselves. If you're at all interested in that, please do check out NPR's Throughline
It's so surreal to be back in Korea, to live here, after my inital part-time job a fucking decade ago. Even reading about that part where I admitted my feelings towards the friends that I made abroad and how I would eventually cease to remain in their consciousness... It really makes me wish having friends. On the bright side, I got in touch with someone from back then. So now life isn't completely lonely. It's just soul-crushingly stressful.
I hope to remember to occasionally make a sardonic and irreverent post from now on. I honestly believe this was the pinnacle of my nonsensical, contrived writing phase and I can't get enough of it. I miss writing. I miss quipping. I long to string nonsensical ideas and daily events together.
Oh yeah.

Rules Redux

So. I finally read the Bret Easton Ellis novel The Rules of Attraction.
I watched the movie a while ago. I blogged about it. I posted the Victor+Europe montage. I filled with admiration to be Lauren/Shannyn Sossamon.
So, found the book in a thrift store. There was one other book I saw penned by Ellis, but I only picked this one. If anything, after reading it I want to go back to college and think about how I can socially fuck with others while damaging my heart in the process.

I forgot how confusing and enjoyable life can be. I miss going to lectures where I laugh 20% of the time and don't understand the content the other 75%. The saving grace is the 5% that makes me feel confident to think I know what's going on because I fantasize about other things. The book was a different experience; getting to know all the characters intimately in their heads, understanding the motives and desires they truly have. It was better to imagine them as more attractive or scummy. What I also liked was the way the book and movie presented these events, all in a cyclical way. There is no true ending. They're all trapped in this perpetual depression and struggle leading to a less than pleasant result. Will hae to read the book again to feel like I'm having a not so shitty life.

Hot Time Plans

Summer reading list:

the house of spirits
little birds
invisible man
the brothers karamazov
jane eyre
withering heights

tentative. possibly more if i actually read these things.

oh

it's a lot different now. whilst i anticipate the change and potential better future, i miss many things. sometimes i wallow in it. other times it's like nothing has changed. maybe a few more people are talking to me? i guess that's better? as i'm finished with important tasks that have been bothering me for years. anyway. i'm still alive.

it's got to be

on days like these, on most days, really, i like to listen to marvin gaye. maybe barry white would be a good option as well. sometimes i think it would be nice if someone sang nice songs to me.

it's valentine's day. let me rejoice in the candy, flower, and card-giving tradition this holiday brings! the only thing is....i didn't get anything from anybody regarding anything about the aforementioned things that are usually given. i'm not bitter. i don't care. but i was just thinking....if i had a someone special in my life, it would be pleasant to at least hear a sweet greeting even if this person was far off. ah, another valentine's day alone.