final toasts

it's the end of the year! as you can see i'm celebrating élégamment with champagne and a nostalgic, somewhat anger-inducing drink. très classy, for sure. i'll probably go out on the balcony and reflect my life thus far.
any hopes for the upcoming, like, expecting anything spectacular?? i know i'm ...not, particularly.

yay

the last friday of the year. this evening should be dedicated to parties. serious parties.

of which i am not in attendance.

c'est une rafolie!

ridiculous sightings:

chicken boy.

hot, demonic clown cheesy puffs.

chocolate covered kale..

why does justin bieber wrapping paper exist?

coool:

jake can be anything.

I'm going through this pokemon phase again. I'm disturbed by the fact that there are so many new pokemon, most that look so absurd and uncool...and kids still go crazy for them.

if i were five, this is the stuff i'd lust after..

batman! !!!

and presumably friends and enemies.

these holiduds

Christmas is upon us yet again. Well, there isn't really anything to stop it; attempts to usurp or destroy Santa haven't exactly been executed properly in the past and then there are other..things to deal with that aren't quite fictional. I don't know about this year, if there was anything to look forward to that was worth the wait or trouble...but maybe that can be said about anything that i've gone through. It's been wrought with disappointment and stress in general. No matter what I do, this year especially, I was overcome with things that caused me to worry, to actually cry in the company of strangers (or usually, how it's done, alone), and i was incapable of just trying to brush it off.



yes. that's a santa sitting in someone's porch.

This is not so much a christmas post, per se, but sort of an early reflection. The end of every year, I would say after I graduated from secondary school, causes me to wonder what I'm good for, what future awaits me, my purpose for existence. I'm here. I need to know why.
Or at least make up a why.

way of being

There's something in the air.

Doing things I've not done in a long while is refreshing.
Suffering from a bit of the ennui as well. I sadly miss the institution and its people.

The most wonderful?

After it all, I still feel nauseous; there's elation, but an impending fear, the dread of what's to come because i fucked up so hard last time. Shit. The greatest release came with but a small sense of satisfaction. No, wait. There was nothing satisfying about it. I couldn't let myself go completely. My expectations were so high.

It was sorely disappointing.

And the red-nosed. bearded, jolly head of Christmas-time is rearing it's head this way. Meh. I put up the tree today (the same tree from when I was five..or around that age). Suspecting it will be lonely. Without those electric-light lawn flamingoes to keep me company. Ah. Here are some interesting things.
Because, you know, people need to see these things.

It's a kermit orgy! or..some sort of masturbatory affair? I think I'm a little too much into the muppets after seeing that free screening of the lastest movie last month. I mean, I watched the muppet christmas carol (Michael Caine and Raymond Coulthard were quite cute i 1992) and i'm currently watching muppets from space. It's not bad. There are references from pop culture back when those sort of things were popular (dawson's creek, mice=spice girls, "the american way"). Yeah.


I thought this looked a little like Nemo, or maybe his mom.


I want the full size version of this.


Solidifying my obsession with wayfarers. My profound fascinations with frames. Freaky note: I'm missing a pair of glasses that belong in the front row there.

Hardcore is not enough... Anymore

Pbs is the greatest godsend.

Watch Interview with Milos Karadaglic on PBS. See more from SOUND TRACKS.

If not the greatest distraction.

Successional Delusion

Here I am, living under my rock. I am tremendously stress out of my mind and I'm quite certain important things will not get done. Nary a motivation can help me now.

It pains my heart to admit it. Truly, truly.

one one one one one one

tried your luck today?

that's ok if you didn't.



mine wasn't as fortunate, either.

Seen and unseen

Hi there. My absence from this blog is extremely apparent. Hmmm. Well, i am here today to discuss/put up/make note of my current interests/obsessions.

first, los campesinos! has a new album, "hello sadness". this band and i have gone back maybe four or five years when I first saw the music video for "you! me! dancing!"


i don't remember how i found it or where i saw it, but i knew i adored the song. from that point on i've been following the band's musical releases and found the majority of them to be pleasing to the ear with enough innovations and continuity; you do a double-take while realizing it's the same twee, blatantly cynic group of welsh musicians.
yesterday i it dawned on me that los campesinos! is the only band i listen to that i feel grew with me; we sort of developed and converged in identical ways, albeit theirs was of a musical form and mine was, more or less, biological. it's the idealogical aspect we share.
that's what i feel, anyway, when i look back on my late high school years, the time i spent in england, my stint in south korea, and where i am now. the parallel is astounding, like one of those "soundtrack to my life" kind of things.
back to this new album: i find it a good listen, i can't stop listening to (a few of) the songs. it's been two days and it's usually the first thing i want to hear when i start my day.
my absolute favorite song has to be "baby, i got the death rattle." the mood of it and oddly clever lyrics with the apt musical composition makes it something i need to have on repeat.



next up, just want to share this from italian class today: il volo. they are absolutely adorable!! we watched this at the end of class, and even though it's a little pavoratti meets jonas brothers circa 2008, the pavorotti aspect beats out the faux-pop-rockers any day.


see!!? even though i was laughing in bewilderment and shame and amazement, you can't help but be mesmerized by their italian charms.

i can't believe they're still teenagers. they are very, very, very cute.
how is it i was unaware of their presence here during the summer?? dang.

The last bit here, i just found while making my rounds on the other blogs i follow. this is alain delon. he is a french actor.






*drool*

europeans on the mind again.

Scared witless

i really, really need to be doing pertinent things related to a theoretical conference in almost a month, but i feel the need to get cracking on some blogging about happenings. hmm. i'm beginning to feel that the concept of sharing thoughts on the webs is waning, for me it's not as vague or seclusive as before; i don't even think i need to foster this technological, as i had often hoped to be "anonymous", identity.
The mystery of purpose.
Porpoise.


Ah, well. Enjoy getting candy and getting scared. I plan to at least be experiencing the latter well into the night.

time of the season

i'm sure i usually attempt something during this time of the month, specifically last week during this time of the month. and not because of something womanly, but because of something that happens yearly and to everyone. yeah. i had another birthday.
it was ..i guess, one level better than last year. level'd up.

i think usually make a big deal about it and all, but...if nothing happened, really, then i don' think there's much of a point to do so. i'm not even upset or anything. that's a skill that builds up over the years, birthday tolerance. learn to use it well.

it hasn't been a great day, though. there's been a surge of demoralization. my brain hurts.

a day in thug life

i'm disappointed september featured a single post. it's almost as bad as 2006, but pictures pretty much salvaged that. indeed, again, i've come to entice you all with recent pictures i've taken at school--no people, really, just what been piquing my interest..that isn't human.

ah, it was raining yesterday. i enjoyed it, especially whilst walking to school, but i realized the pitfalls of it when i sat in class, the front of my trousers were relatively drenched and throughout the day as my super soaked shoes & socks would not dry.


that's what it looked like, the view from my favorite place on campus to find respite.

here's something i found on the wall and enhanced a bit by paying tribute to that great monster in the sky.

i added the moniker so other people would be aware of the greatness presiding next to them.
here are some things from a classROOM! i've come to really enjoy this class, it's about proto-indo-european (i'm not sure about that whole hyphen deal..) and it's absolutely amazing seeing all these similarities between and hearing explanations behind languages. there are two things i don't much care for:
1. revisiting latin

2, these ridiculous chairs attached to the desks

if you look closely, there should be a hinge-y part visible halfway the back of the chair. every time anyone moves, that thing screeches like a banshee.
and this is my interpretation of my professor.

i know it looks a lot scary, but..he mostly looks like that. with a very dry voice and style of..humor? whenever he laughs it kinda sounds like he's choking, but his face has a maniacal mein, a little like the joker from good versions of batman. anyway, it's the mustache that makes the man.

got what U want

what i'm very well aware of: i haven't been here for nigh over a month plus two days and that normal blogs are chock full of visuals to attract an audience. well. i'm not exactly that kind of blogger who wants to rack up reader/visitor numbers with pictures, but someone out there, i have no idea who nor do i care to know, has criticized this lacking aspect of my web-extended life and, you know what? Fine. Here is a shitload of distractions to stare at in awe and/or longing while i describe them each with a short sentence.


This is from a t-shirt and the proceeding ones are also from clothing; the sunglasses and the rainbow mane make this zebra the hippest ungulate on the block.


It's a cute lion.


I might've liked to actually wear the t-shirt with this design when i was in middle school, going through that imaginary "rebellious" phase.


If you've been to ikea recently you'd know they're campaigning for kids to play with their soft, giant, manufactured food.


i remember seeing this on tv, but i don't remember if i watched it.


i like this necklace; it's themed for halloween at target, but i want to wear it all the time.


oh my god, this was at the 99¢ only store and i was all, "what the hell??" when i saw the name of this brand.

okok, so, if you look down about two or three posts from the past, i mentioned a sale that 2k was having and i was down to get some new threads. and indeed i did. i had ordered two new shirts, but one turned out to be out of stock (disappointment! it was hilarious). this is the one that i ultimately received:

yeah. that's david shrigley. seriously, i anticipate wearing this shirt when i feel as such.

check this out:

is there no less awesomeness seeing darth vader get bunny ear'd? OH. NO, WAY. this shirt was really a steal. less than $7 for it? hm, i think yes.

in reality, i have a collection of the best t-shirts--from elephant wangs to flipping the bird sideways. yeah, better be digging those out of the closet again.

ends Up

everybodies. i can almost taste the good old chilling to be had for the remainder of my summer. after this weekend, seriously gonna be sleeping in and trying to fit in video gaming (too neo-old school) and making those long ago, thought out interweb mixtapes. i'm actually looking forward to these things. oh yeah, i suppose that summer bucket list has gotta come into being one of these days...

hmm, as much as i long to be relaxing and spazzing over how to beat last level bosses, there is business to attend to. figurative, but seriously serious stuff. i wish my brain could take a break, though. i mean, i had a final yesterday and i was dying last night while i was working on a report/presentation. i quit thinking right after i took that test so it was hard as hell to concentrate. i thought about putting an inappropriate little simile there, but..eh.
it's so surprising that i actually stuck out the whole nine weeks for that summer class! i wasn't sure i was gonna make it, 'cuz there was always a lot of shit to do and other people had chicken'd out and quit, but here i am, a testament to droll will power. it was also kinda fun(ny) sometimes. i'm so astonished and proud! it's a feeling that hasn't been around much lately. the food today was boss. and those weird games where people ate stuff. the not normally so tasty stuff. it would've been better with a pint of a miscellaneous melange of alcoholic beverages..and maybe bodily fluids/snacks, but i digress! i didn't mean to bring in my saturday night routine.

i just feel relief.

more of it

ok, so remember way back when, maybe more than a few months ago, and i announced on this thing that i had a girl crush? i must admit i've probably had a few more since then (..can't seem to remember right now, these things come and go in unpredictable cycles) and right now, at this very moment i have to say my latest one has got to be daisy lowe. i have no idea why. this damn tumblr might be one of the deciding factors, but, really, i've always liked her hair, at least. whatevs. it's possibly a fleeting thing.

les rêves en verité!

This makes me very, very happy. indeed, i couldn't believe it at first and i was trying to hold back my ...latent excitement.
Maybe my college freshman self would be doing back-flips out the window and moonwalking on the ceiling, trying to get to england any which way she could.

as tempting as it is, i know i'll be trying my damnedest to hold out for that frapanese scottie.

theoretical fruit of the loins

hi. the days have just been flying by, haven't they? in the meantime, i occupied myself with plant-tending. this is the product of patience:


behold.
my baby avocado tree.
it took...so damn long to finally see this thing grow. the thing looked like an alien back in the day. or i've heard people say.been thinking about naming it, but..nothing's really coming to me.

we think we Assume so

oh! i really don't seem to have the time to keep this up lately. my reasons are legitimate. so, onto the new things that been going on hurrr..

interesting events regarding summer school: a hummingbird flew into our class whilst we were taking out test yesterday. there were attempts to lure it towards and out the windows, but to no avail. not sure if it got out or died...
there was a language exchange activity thing yesterday, too. it was fun...the things we had to do were ちょっと変 at first or, y'know, weird at best. hmm. yeah. the students were very cute. the ones in our group, from what i saw/experienced. very nice.

mmmm, uh, oddly enough, i've finished my homework early and have quite a bit of free time--so prior to getting down with this i took a break reclining upside-down. i find it relaxing. part nostalgic.
i think in future posts...i'm gonna put up pictures or things i especially like/sometimes (sadly) obsess over.
oh my gosh, though, are you in the know about 2kshirts kinda sales for womens' tees? the majority of them are 1/2 (mebbe a tad bit more than) off so..um, you might wanna order some david shrigley and vänskap while good sizes are still available. i fucking know i will.





you can't resist.

four specious skies, bored on the forth of

sadly, it's all about the ice cream and popsicles these days. so, how's this fourth of july? i'm not taking sticker pictures or eating at mossburger or moping about a regrettable evening with someone i thought was a much better person or catching fireflies or watching fireworks like all normal, patriotic people do. like most times, like all times, i'll be slaving away well into the evening to get my homework done. you'd think that one times too many would be enough and make me realize i seriously gotta get my shit together, but i guess my brain doesn't deduce like that.

enjoying the day off otherwise.

i don't remember what I'll be doing in the future.

it's the end of the month! summer is about...maybe 1/3 over? ooohh. there's still so much warm weather things i need to do..alas, i've still gotta be worrying about homework and tests. i'm rather relieved right now as i just finished taking mega test (no lies, it was とても難しい) and going through an ordeal of an oral test. yo. get yo mind out that gutter.
so. after doing more homework, napping, and eating some cinnamon toast crunch ('cuz you know that's the best cereal ever) i thought to myself, i thought, "i need to devote some time to my blog. the damn thing has been around for nearly five years or so and, dagnabit, i haven't been giving it some sugar like i used to."
here i am, then. um. i guess i can talk about some stuff. i don't really want to mention shit about school since..that's, like, the only thing that's usually on here. stuff on my mind, then.

ok! i have something interesting and a li'l intellectual to talk about. i recently read a myth in that mini western myth anthology-like thing i had to read when i was a senior in high school. this particular myth, oddly enough, i never chanced to read before and it scared the shit out of me (ah, i think i was reading this other story that referenced a similar event happening so i was inclined to check the original out). turns out dionysus had these female followers called maenads who were totally ..kinda crazy? They were unaware of and uncontrollable over their actions and would kill or maim or whatever else had you--kinda like the berserk effect in final fantasy games. yeah and they would rip people apart..like the king of thebes in the certain myth i was reading about. can you imagine...

ok. remember how i'm, like, nearly insanely obsessed with REGULAR SHOW? i was looking around for music from the show and i stumbled upon this blog.
i was excited. there's such awesome, funny, odd stuff on there..
maybe next month will be more fruitful and i'll remember what i was supposed to do.

tsk tsk. OOOOOHHHHHHHH!

hey. after only, like, two real classes of summer school i feel totally spent--like, y'know, my brain has already overloaded with new fangled vocabulary and grammar. what the h? i learned most of it before so all this is like a manual reboot for my brain. so weird because my mouth tends to work faster than my brain in dire circumstances. at least i'm kinda making friends? well, willingly, perhaps.

with all the time i have being used up for mostly learning, there is little room for error in making the best of my breaks. thus i have turned to TV on the internet. i guess over the past few months i've been watching cartoonnetwork whenever i'm in the vicinity of a tv where i am in control of the clicker. and all i've been watchin, 'cuz i'm lucky that it's always on, is REGULAR SHOW. oh my, i haven't been this excited about a cartoon targeted for a younger audience since, uh...the marvelous misadventures of flapjack, i think. seriously, though, this animation clearly has older people themes/relevances. of course it's all subtle and things are substituted with kid-friendly stuff (eg: beer=soda). i was so shocked when i heard mordecai and rigby saying, "crap" and "pissed" and...(i'm so probably sure) "damn" 'cuz i was totally thinking kids are watching this, knowing those might be some offensive words, but at the rate at which english is being desecrated these days...in MY day, that language was reserved for cartoons only on the comedy central/[a s]/primetime local TV kinda place. i mean, i wasn't suspecting it. i can't stop watching it---sooo amazing. i have a brain crush on mordecai, but rigby is adorable and pops is just old-timey weird that i giggle everytime he breaks out dancing and...OH MAN.


yeah. i'm kinda obsessed right now.

hahaha.."we need more guests with breasts and i ain't talkin' 'bout mine."

Procrastinator II: the return

it's the weekend before finals! oh my god, i have too much shit to deal with that isn't even academic and it's stressing me out to the max. i just had a final this morning, as a matter of fact, but it wasn't, like too difficult i felt like dying when i saw what was on it. the thing was just a, you know..a major bitch since it was on a SATURDAY morning. oh. that reference reminds me of the times i used to do SATs and that sort of stuff. that was a real long time ago, when i think about it. maaaannnn...i don't want to be dealing with this even though it's seriously gon'be over right quick. what i'm worried about the most is this paper for one of my classes (seems every quarter i have to produce something of college-level writing relating to the course) that i haven't really started and it's worth a shitload of my total grade. dammit, i thought i told myself i was gonna start these sort of papers earlier. i'm still not entirely sure what i'll be writing about, too..AH ME GODS.

i'm looking forward to days when i feel like this. but that requires a bit more extroversion.

so.

um.

i think i'm going to cry in the corner over there and then start studying for my grammar police entrance exam (no lies, syntax makes you an official officer for real verbal offenses) and stress over my seemingly-never-to-be-started paper. i'm sure i'll get it done in time, it's just gonna be hell.

fill my Specifier

it's seriously like i have more time that i can handle, but it gets squandered ...mysteriously. having the day off wasn't the best thing ever as there were errands and such that needed to be "taken care of". claiming tiredness don't even come close to what i really feel. all this drinking an' pseudo-partying, though very fun at times, is fucking up my basic functioning. too far behind in shit i shoulda finished ages ago. anyways.

the quarter is almost over, like, really. the school year is nigh on ending. eeeee. although i'm close to declaring surviving a school year, i can't exactly say it was vastly successful. there are things i'd definitely fo differently, other people/groups i'd have liked to associate with, planning classes better and with care..BUT i'm not at all upset with what i did do, who i met, and a few of the things i learned. i'm basically sated for the time being.
yeah. there's too much going on and being worried about the upcoming year and planning potential super good times--i'm stressed beyond my age limit.

ways to manipulate giving "head"

it's may! oh man. thinking back on the things i was up to last year and vice versa..what an extreme turn of events. even the people i'm always with--totally, totally different, in a somewhat endearing approach, people. it's really weird when i think about it; what i'm doing and etc. i can't believe it, really, and i'm mostly terrified..probably without (any/good) reason.

i also feel like this has been neglected for an extended period of time. sorry. i mean, there definitely isn't a cult following for this blog, eh? no. i mean, what the hell are people gonna come on here to read? the random nostalgic shit i somehow remember after all these years? well..i do that, but only because there's a feasible relevance that induces me to laughter/tears/deep contemplation.bedsides, it's too creepy to think about all the people who about reading every little thing in here. anyway. it's so ..crazy. seeing and reading about my life back in the day. overall, very, very disappointing (except on my occasional overseas "excursions"). i'm theorizing things could be getting better..i must.

yeaaaaahh. so that's a brief and vague update on me life. relish it.

don't mind my chronic infatuation with british rock music. i can't even explain this resurgence--of '90s music no less! (and i really can't get enough of the smashing pumpkins' music videos. i would dig having me some angsty '90s teenage friends to go to house parties with.) gotta be lovin' that center-parted semi-long hair on guys. classic.

memories of two

i guess this is one of those times that's a little more obscure and self-reflective than normal. well. you might be thinking, "hey. this thing is always like that. there isn't anything here that i immediately understand unless it's through a stupid reference that i remember from that book/show/song/etc." in the grand tradition of things, this post will follow suit, undeniably and then some.

within in the past week, i've been engaging in activities i used to reserve for special occasions or, y'know, weekday nights after a difficult day dealing with clingy, violent kids. i'm not lamenting the fact it's going on, i really missed it--the stress, the talking, the bonding over questionable omelets, and i totally think those last two activities are nearly synonymous with the exception of the addition of food there--and although the ones these days aren't nearly as delicious (yes, i mean dinnertimes) or , dare i say, intimate, it's been a good substitute.

i really have to stop relying on the drinks to make my evening tops. i'm not that dependent, no.
and i've actually forgotten the point of this post, like always.

At Your local Kubrick library.

way too into school. i'm surprised i've been going out on monday nights, spending money, and ending up in questionably apartments filled with guys. it's cool. i'm used to it--bars, hotel rooms, bathrooms, i've dealt with them all. at least my social life is considerably more exciting.

here's a rundown on my new academic life: all my classes are loathsome, with the subject exception of italian where we always end up laughing about morire. there's a grandpa, a hipster, and some lady..i really miss last quarter with mr. sweaty. anyways! there are so many things to do and people for me to see, time schedule nonconflicting pending, that leave me excited, eager for le weekend.

so, lately all i've been watching is good ol' simpsons episodes, seasons 1, 2, and 5. here are two shots of attractive, fictional womans that often get lost in all the dialogue and story and the fact that you were eating that sandwich instead of watching the screen:




i really like marge with her hair down.next time i hope to catch some other good'lookin' guest star characters.

& Now I See

hey hey hey. ok. i neglected to say..i was on a glasses hunt. this wasn't even recent! i mean, i like my cheapie ones from korea, but they weren't exactly what i was looking for..plus i needed to update my prescription. i happen to be nearsighted and it was really weird that my eyesight was apparently better than the last time i went in (this further fuels my theory that i'm aging backwards). after countless days of scouring the internets for nice frames and wondering if the retro red ones i snatched up at the salvations army were right for me, i found warby parker through notcot. their frame selection has everything i ever thought about putting on my face and the price was relatively decent. Also! for every frame sold via them they donate a pair to someone who needs some vision correction in a veritably less providing country. essentially: buy and they gift glasses to the needy (pending these people need them). there's this nice feature where you can pick some frames to be sent to you to try on irl if you can't get to someplace that carries them (i guess another nice way to gauge if they look good on you via friends/family/pets/people on the street) for five days. so, here are the ones i initially picked out:

i really like the little box they came in! anyway, they probably look all black, but the fourth one was actually a deep navy...after trial and error and reconsiderations and input, i decided that the owen (second pictured in the preceding pictures) would be mine in my quest for fashionably better eyesight. i received them in the mail last week and, by golly they're nice! i look exquisitely educated and i can see better/suffer less eye pain because i used to be an avid squinter.

i don't know if i ever mentioned it on here and i can't tell if it's evident from one of the blogs i've linked on the "get thee to--" section on the side there, but i adore glasses. i'll even go as far to say i have a glasses fetish (well, maybe not that extreme, but damn near close). i can't pinpoint when or why it happened, although i know the first guy i ever liked wore them...i guess it's the connotations that are synonymous with wearing them (eg: scholarly) and how they can make faces look all the more better. with the latter said, not all glasses enhance equally so i don't drool over any ol' fellow wearing a pair. if done correctly, however, like in this case and in the manner of my italian teacher last quarter, i just might start to obsess.